Month: April 2019

Keep Moving Your Body

chattykathy2016

Please note that I began this blog post about two weeks ago. I did not get to finish it on time due to my painful right wrist and elbow. I have been in therapy for that. I have also broke my eyeglasses. I was just sitting down and they fell off my face. I am wearing old ones without the bifocals. They are rather frustrating with reading and writing. My wrist and elbow are doing better and still doing therapy, the focus is now strengthening them. I had an injury in July of 2018 and never followed through. Lesson learned.

Last week I blogged about an app I started using called “5 Minute Workouts”. I am really enjoying it. I can feel it working on my body no doubt. I have included a picture of the app when I open it up. This way you know what I was talking about last week and today.

I have done the Fat Loss, Abs, Chest & Arms. I can feel it working. I am also on a healthy diet along with low calorie meals. My diet consists of low sodium for example. That helps me nor feel so bloated and with my Chronic Kidney Disease it is wise to not have much sodium. I also need to watch my protein choices, such as red meat. There are other ways to get protein and in small ounces and better choices. I will always say and agree with this, water, water, water! It cleans you out, yes you need to empty that bladder but it helps with your skin and nails. It makes you feel cleaner in the long run.

I will add to this post that the “free” part of the 5 Minute Workout is just the 2 days. But you can keep sing those again. You can continue to mark have many reps you have done. Due to my recent pain in my elbow and neck I have had to change up my workout. There are times you need to do that. My app even reminded me to do my work out.  I feel this app is helpful to get yourself moving around and to use on your phone if you want to get your body moving. As always with any diet and exercise program please check with your physicians due to any physical and health limitations. I have had some neck pain from sleeping on a bad mattress so I was not doing my crunches right with pulling up in regards to my neck. So I need to pay attention and make changes just like anyone else in any program. This can happen with anyone in any workout and diet. If you have any apps you feel are great for workouts and diets, please share them in the comments. Have a great week! 

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Must Finish My Book

chattykathy2016

Yes, you read that title right. I have been trying to get my life story out. To be honest we all have one. As for mine it is a story of love, hate, kidnapping, abuse of all kinds, homelessness and so much more. You would think just those few things would be enough but it is not. I was also conned by someone and it destroyed my family. I also was in an abusive relationship. I deal with PTSD and I am in therapy managing it quite well.

I heard about “Wattpad” from another blogger where I can write my story and share it. I may try that out. I have also shared bits and pieces here on my blog about my story. I will continue to write it and I feel using WordPress for my blogging experience has helped.

Since the last week of February things have picked up in my life for writing on WordPress. I went from 20 followers to 100. For me that is amazing! I am so grateful for this experience and I will continue on. I believe reading from others helps you for your blog. Plus it is helping me with my writing for my story and I am truly grateful.

Have any of you found a site or an app that works great for you in writing a short story or a book? What suggestions can you give me and my readers?

Have a fabulous week everyone!

Truth About Parental Mistakes

chattykathy2016

I found this article on MSN News this morning. It is 50 Things Grandparents Should Never Do. I agree and understand, some things can be helpful, when communicated. I know where I made my mistakes while my daughter’s were young.

When I was getting divorced my girl’s were young and we moved in with my parents. Some say first mistake, others say it could be very helpful. I will briefly tell you bits and pieces of mistakes that corelate with the article below.

First Mistake: No Communicating with my parents prior to moving in period! We were not that close, as in constant calls on a daily basis. So when it came to moving in I had to do it by myself in a 4-door Saturn. My dad (step-dad for those that know my story) was going to help with the pickup truck but since I drove out (1 hour away) with the girls he chose not to go out there. I wanted to clean up a bit more and not let my dad see how depressed I was just before going to my parents place. I was ashamed. But I chose not to communicate that with them. Communication between your parents in regards to anything with your children is key to a healthy relationship. It is about the kids and not you. That was my problem.

Second Mistake: While living with my parents I was able to work full time and return to college full time. I even managed a 4.0 with everything. I chose to work hard and wanted that for my daughter’s future. But I began to allow my parents, mostly my mother, to interfere with discipling the girls. It was hard to separate the fun grandma and grandpa and their mom in the same residence. Then if they needed to do homework and I was working, it become a nightmare. I ended up working nightshift at the hospital. That just eventually (couple years) burnt me out. I needed to clean the house and other responsibilities done in the daylight hours. I was tired. My mom did nothing but complain no matter what hours I worked, nothing pleased her. It did not help our family dynamics.

Throughout the years and even before my divorce my parents always bought clothing and toys for them. They actually had a bedroom at their house prior to us moving in. When we moved in we each had our own rooms. How lucky can we be? The three of us each have a bedroom and a private bath. That does not normally happen. Do not get me wrong I will always be truly grateful. When my car broke down I used their extra car. Now who does that? The problem is I always felt guilty or obligated. Like I owe them and they should make the decisions as they are right.

What really should have happened is communication from the beginning, prior to me moving in. Even when I moved in a signed agreement if need be. I gave my paychecks to my dad all the time so my money helps the family out, as in me and the girls and my parents. I wanted to be fair. The electric bill went up, water, etc. Participation in household expenses is fair. They always helped with Santa gifts since the girls were born. I knew I could never compete with that. I will always be grateful for my parents to help me when I was so far down in depression and no where to go when getting divorced. They gave their home to us. That home was a home until they both passed, at very young ages of cancer. Being a parent and a grandparent is a gift from God. Communication is the key. Without that you do not have great relationships with your children and parents eventually.

For me, my mom went on Hospice and I stayed home for that 6 months to care for her with my girls and dad. It helped us connect. We lost all those years because I just had to be right and so did she. We were stubborn women. My daughter’s are now 22 & 24 with their own lives and careers. My 22 year old has a 15 month old adorable little boy. But they do not have that much respect for me in the parenting game. Interference can cause too many dilemmas that you do not want. My dad and I never really connected like he did with my daughter’s. They loved their grandpa and that is sweet. My oldest took real good care of him with his cancer. He gave me an “olive branch” the Christmas before he passed. We were not on good terms. He was always good to me and he suffered the loss of my mom deeply. We always got pajamas on Christmas Eve from Mrs. Claus (my mom). I loved that even as a teenager. So I welcomed the tradition for my girls and wanted to keep it going. I still do today. My dad’s “olive tree” to me was pajamas for Christmas 2014. I will never forget. He passed away days before his birthday in February 2015.

Mistakes are what we make as parents and grandparents. Why don’t we communicate better to not let it affect future relationships. It is the BIG mistakes that make the difference in our lives. Please share with me below what you think of the article and if anything has happened like it shares.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/family-relationships/50-things-grandparents-should-never-do/ss-BBVdt8U?ocid=sf

Stigmatism of Abuse

chattykathy2016

Well said for those who have been in abused an neglected households. I do know that every situation was and is different. As I have written before I was a child of a parental kidnapping. I knew there was something off but life was not easy for my sister and I. He had us in hiding and even though we went to school we were basically sheltered. I remember going to a Day Care Center, I believe in Kettering, Ohio and they were asking us about all the bruises on us. He tried to cover up but we got hurt for that at home. Next thing you know we moved away to Connecticut for a while so things cooled over. Eventually we were back in Kettering, Ohio and I thought if I complain to my teachers about my home but that did not work out as planned. My sister was the one who said nothing and I was the one who wanted to fight for my rights. We were both abused physically, mentally, socially, and sexually. But back when I was abused the law was different and only so much can be done. As for today with abused and neglected children, there is that stigmatism depending where you live, your religion, or race. The only select few get away with such horrible crimes due to their pocketbooks from what I have seen. Yes, people of all income types can abuse children and neglect them. Never being home and raising your children can have an affect on them. I understand working because many do just to get by but constant traveling and rarely seeing your children, not attending ANY events is a concern. Neglect comes in many ways. Abuse and neglect happens unfortunately and just thinking oh someone must know, they probably do not. Please be aware of how to approach the topic as you want to get any predator in any sexual assault crime. I hope to get a chance soon to read the book in the article I have linked below.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/health/mentalhealth/she-survived-child-abuse-for-years—heres-what-everyone-gets-wrong-about-it/ar-BBPGpdQ?ocid=spartanntp

Missing, Have You Seen Me?

chattykathy2016

Today in the news we see a story about a missing boy found. I do remember this story. I could not imagine my child being taken away or lost out there. Well I was on the other end and did not know. I was a missing child and my mother was searching for my sister and I. We were a parental abduction.

As you can see above one of the many news articles from when my sister and I were recovered. Also that is one of the milk cartons that had our pictures on. It is so weird that we never saw ourselves on one in school.

This is my simple version of the story. Our parents were divorcing and it was not going well. One weekend our “dad” told us to pack extra clothes. I still remember this, I was 7 and my sister was 5. When we said our goodbyes I think my hug was extra special I just had that feeling as I look back. You can get that feeling but back in 1977 that was not enough to stake out and not allow visitation. I do remember awful arguments between my parents. He was at that time really weird at my 7 year old self. Now I would project him as a pedophile. That is not a good observation as someone looking in. I always felt creepy near him. These things I told my mom and whatever she observed her lawyer and local police knew. Nothing could be done. As a mother I cannot imagine her instincts being shut down and having to give your kids to this horrible man. Police were always involved when it came to visitation and upon our returns.

The day he took us we had no idea what was going on. All I remember is falling asleep in a moving truck with my little sister and waking up at a gas station. He was talking to someone. They seemed familiar but I cannot identify who it was. We woke up the next day in Miamisburg, Ohio. While eating breakfast he told us our mother has died and she was a drug addict and anyone with her last name, maiden name of course were bad people. I could not even be friends with someone with the same last name because they could be working together. Little did I know that summer my mom took him to the hospital and he was diagnosed as a paranoid schizophrenic. It all made sense to me later in life. He even changed our last name. As children back in November 1977 at the ages of 5 and 7 it was very normal for us to just follow through with these rules and instructions. However, I was not believing anything about my mom. I remember crying about what he said and told never to cry or speak of her or her family again.

We did go to school and were very shy and naïve. We then traveled to Kettering, Ohio. He ended up taking us to New Britain and Hartford, Connecticut. We ended up back at the same place in Kettering, Ohio. That is what mostly represents our growing up and friendships.

How we were found is quite amazing in my eyes. John Walsh was having a movie about his son Adam who was kidnapped and murdered. He is a wonderful man, we met him once. He is always finding ways for safety. After the movie on NBC the show “Missing: Have You Seen This Person?” aired. They interviewed my mom, pictures of us when we went missing, picture of our “dad”. Then they used an artist named Scott Barrows who drew (yes, pencil and paper back then) what we would look like at that time. That time was 1985! Everyone called in our neighborhood and school. It was like they finally found what was missing for us. We were both searching for something as well. Our mom lost us at 5 and 7 we were recovered at 13 and 15. No one knew what to do back in 1985 in regards in mental health therapy.

I think today young people end up to meet others online that they do not know. They want to run away from their homes. We need to take care of our homes so we no longer lose our children. Unfortunately with any type of kidnapping abuse is possible and there must be therapy for that person. No one should ever suffer from this. Here is a great resource for you about missing children. It is The National Center For Missing and Exploited Children. http://www.missingkids.org/

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/who-is-timmothy-pitzen-who-disappeared-from-the-chicago-area/ar-BBVAM7o

 

Is This Insensitivity?

chattykathy2016

Today we see many commercials on television and advertisements on social media about serious issues that need attention. Friends share their posts and send messages about it. After a while you get sick of it. It does not mean you have no heart or are insensitive. Well unless you really are a hateful person per se. But you can only take in so much everyday. Our hearts can only handle so much everyday. We have our cares and things we shoot for. There are false organizations out there and that bothers me for people to take advantage of others kind hearts. However, I can only see pictures of animals looking abused as well as children. Some things trigger you and you just have to change the channel or scroll down. You are not being insensitive if it bothers you. You know this stuff happens but you can only take on so much. I always say a little pray because I cannot afford to help everyone. Oh I wish I could. I know we all have good hearts but I know you all can only do so much and I can too. Do not let the world make you feel horrible. You are a good person for caring. You can only see so much. Our brains need to be healthy as well.

What Inspires You?

chattykathy2016

I encourage you to look deep inside to find something that inspires you today. I know that some people feel a rainbow can be inspiring, hearing a person sing, a baby playing and a big blue sky. Find something deep inside your soul and share it with me below so we can possibly inspire one another.

Wanna Get Moving?

chattykathy2016

I know it is hard sometimes to set a designated time to workout. Even with those fighting any health issue. So I found an app for a 5 minute workout and started it out today. I did not sign up for the Premium as I want to see my results but after my 5 minute Fat Loss Workout I felt myself moving my heartrate and it made me feel FANTASTIC!

The app I downloaded is called 5 Minute Home Workout. I found it from the Apple Store. I also have it on my Windows Laptop. This way I can do this workout anywhere at anytime. You can do Fat Loss, Abs, Butt & Legs, Chest & Arms, Pilates, Yoga. There is also a Multi workout. I like the idea of starting out with a 5 minute and then if possible gradually add on to your workout. Or you can start it out that way. This is an easy way to bring your workout with you. For me so far so good. I will keep you updated. I do like how you count how many crunches you do so you can see how far you have gone. I would look into it.

Do any of you use a simple workout to get your body going? Please share below so we can encourage one another.